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December 12, 2010

I guess I should mention that I finally told my family about not going to school. I thought that there would be a lot of tears on my end, and that my dad would attempt on making me feel like a failure, but that wasn’t the case at all. My grandma called me yesterday morning just to see what was up and I told her. She of course asked why, so I told her about the headaches, and how I went to the optometrist and my prescription worsened and that I developed astigmatism in my left eye. She asked what my plans, and I guess I surprised her by telling her a pretty solid two year plan on what I was going to do. She said “sorry you changed your mind” but isn’t that what life is about? Changing your mind? If we didn’t change our minds, life would be a dull, boring place. I’m happy I went to school, I did learn some skills. I found out that I do NOT want a creative job at all. My whole life I thought I’d want to involve the arts in my career, but after going to school, and then doing nothing art related the past few weeks, I’ve discovered making it a job would suck out all the fun of it! So, I’m going to do a little more research into the TA courses (hopefully mostly night courses) and get the ball rolling on that since it starts at $22.00. STARTS at. That’s amazing.
My dad asked me how school was going and I just blurted everything out. I told him that it caused health problems, that I wasn’t giving 100% and that I wasn’t loving it. He agreed that it was a lot of money to spend on something you don’t love. Besides, you need to be good or you end up paying all this money and then working at a coffee shop. The guy that sold me my iMac went to AI and graduated, and he works at a fucking computer store. Anyways. I think my dad finding out he has diabetes and now eating healthier and not drinking has really made him into a better person. He’s actually supportive, and compassionate and I’ve never seen that in him, ever. I feel good to call him my dad, and I haven’t really experienced that feeling before, we always kind of butt heads.
I guess I never really appreciated how important it is to have supportive family. I know I have a couple of friends that don’t have a lot of support in their family, or don’t have family that lets them do their own thing and make their own mistakes. I’m really incredibly lucky to have family, friends & a supportive boyfriend in my life. The only thing that could make me happier right now is winning the lottery so I could go on a vacation, gah!

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